Ohhboy.

*Sidenote: you boy who reads this..ignore this post. I'm only writing to him here because if I put it anywhere else he'll see it*


I've just gotta release thoughts where I know it's safe.

Adam. hifsdhohegvshrigh. Stop being angry and grrr with me. Come now. It's been about 3 months since everything blew up... I'm sorry. For everything. You were right. I was wrong. I was right. YOU were wrong. I can't stand not talking to you. Tactfully avoiding you in the hallways at school, eye contact is like freakin WWIII!!
NOW..you have to be my fiance in our senior show. We have to be in love. We have to kiss. We have to like each other..but WE HAVE TO BE IN LOVE! We're good actors..but we're not that good when there's still bad energy between us. You know that we care about each other. I adore the crap out of some of you. Other yous are mean and I don't particularly like those...but I deal with them.

So now you want me to be the one to stand up and fight, or take the first step at fixing things. for once. okay. yeah. I can do that. I will do that. I just need to know you'll LISTEN to me. and not be all grrr anger/sadness/hate. We've come so far past that. You have to know that. Believe me. Please? Thank you. I can't stand the fact you're not there anymore. You always listened to me about things, when I know it was the last thing you wanted to be doing. I miss the comfort/support/understanding when I completely broke down in your car. You were there through it all. and now when I need you most you're gone. Both of you are. which is a bit funny, considering he's the reason you went away in the first place BUT... yeah.

Let's just work this out. Now.